Those Light Bulb Jokes
These lightbulb jokes that poke fun at SEO, PPC and Social Media folk have been doing the rounds. A reader, Lianne Byrne-Hammacott, mailed them to me so had to share it with you.
How many SEO consultants does it take to change a light bulb?
One. All she needs to do is first migrate the bulb to WordPress, install some SEO-optimizing widgets and the rest is easy.
How many real SEO consultants does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change the light bulb and another to conduct a controlled experiment that shows that although rookie SEOs think the light bulb has changed, in reality there are over 200 factors that go into determining the state of the light bulb and we can’t really know for sure that the light bulb has indeed changed.
How many black hat SEOs does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Black hat SEOs don’t change the light bulb. They just redirect people to a different room where there is no light.
How many Social Media consultants does it take to change a light bulb?
None. “Look, if all you’re thinking about is changing the light bulb, you’re missing the point. The idea is to first lurk around in the room and watch other people changing light bulbs. Then, start providing commentary and encouragement to those that are changing light bulbs. Then, build relationships with these people in the lighting community. Then — and only then, should you even think about trying to change the light bulb.
There are even more social media light bulb jokes to go with these paid and organic search jokes below…
How many StumbleUpon users does it take to change a light bulb?
12. One to change the light bulb while 11 others thumb them up and cheer them on
How many link baiters does it to change a light bulb?
None. “All you have to do is get a bunch of high-powered people to point to the light bulb and Google will take care of the rest.
How many PPC (Pay Per Click) experts does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But she’s smart enough to know that you can’t just focus on “light bulb”. You need to “change light bulb”, “replace light bulb”, “fix light bulb” and “new light bulb”. But, not of course, “light bulb” as that’s way too pricey and drives a bunch of unqualified people that are not really interested in changing light bulbs.
How many search engine optimizers does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but it’s gonna take about 3-6 months to start to see the light bulb change. And that light bulb’s pretty high up there- are you sure you wouldn’t rather change 10 easier light bulbs?
How many pay per click experts does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one but the cost depends on how much the other light bulb changers are currently charging- and you’re going to need a totally new kind of light bulb for that fixture. Actually I have to create it. I’ve never seen a fixture quite like that one.
How many social media gurus does it take to change a light bulb?
It’s not about the change- it’s about engaging people in conversations about the light bulb change.
How many advertising agencies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Oh well that all depends… what’s your budget?
How many PR people does it take to change a light bulb?
We can’t change it, but we can tell other people that we need it changed. And we can’t be sure if it gets changed but we can estimate if it probably got changed based on other people’s light bulb changing.
How many email marketers does it take to change a light bulb?
Wait- did the light bulb opt in? Cuz we can’t spam light bulbs just cuz you want to.
How many web designers does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one- he made the rest of the room look really freaking cool, so someone should definitely want to come in here and change that light bulb for you sometime soon.
How many viral video people does it take to change a light bulb?
Three; one guy to film it, a teenager to change the light bulb then faceplant off the ladder, and a dog to immediately skateboard by past him, wagging its tail.
How many digg users does it take to change a light bulb?
431. One power user and another 427 of their “closest” friends to help them. It is widely known that it is impossible to change the light bulb without asking/begging for a bunch of friends to help you change it. And finally, 11 users to leave comments on why if you had just switched to Apple you wouldn’t have to change the light bulb.